It is with great sadness that I have to report that Ed’s father, Edward A. Moretti, passed away on Monday, June 25. He had been battling cancer for over two years — this year it moved into his brain, sealing his fate. He died at home in his own bed surrounded by his family.
Eddie was a kind, generous, gentle man who was always quick with a joke or a bit of advice. In many ways, Eddie was the rock and the compass of the family, quietly supporting and guiding everyone. He was always very loving to me and I adore him like my own father. He loved his family and had the hugest heart in the world. I am very grateful that his son, my Ed, is blessed with his kindness, vast capacity for love, generosity, and, dare I say, good looks. Dad Moretti will be horribly missed.
The very next day on Tuesday, June 26, I had a full hysterectomy to take out my fibroid, Melvin, and his little brother (seen in the photo above). As you recall from previous posts, Melvin was wreaking havoc on my bladder, causing urinary retention and daily catheterization. Well, it turns out the fibroid was also putting pressure on my spine and nerves, causing lower back pain that I contributed to my weight gain. How wrong I was! My doctor urged that I get a full hysterectomy immediately. He was concerned that I had permanent damage to my bladder, urethra, and spine, and waiting for the operation would only make matters worse.
So first thing on Tuesday morning I had my surgery — he took my cervix, uterus, and tubes, leaving my ovaries so that I wouldn’t go into menopause. According to my doctor, I had one of the most twisted uteruses he’s ever seen. Not only was it tilted, but it was so lodged into my pelvic floor that he needed to literally “shoe horn” it out of me.
I can’t tell you much about the day of the surgery except that I was terrified. I remember all the prep and seeing the OR. I remember how incredibly nice, understanding, and caring everyone was. I remember cracking jokes in Post-Op. I also remember my doctor showing us a photo of my uterus and noting that it looked like a big rump roast. I slept the entire day. The nurses were trying to get me to move but I refused, stating that it’s been over a decade since I had absolutely nothing to do but sleep and you damn well know that’s all I’m going to do! HA! So that’s what I did: slept. I ate some broth and jello, drank lots of water, and slept … and slept … and slept.
I was told that my stay would be 2-3 days and that I would most likely be released on Thursday. I was determined to go home on Wednesday; after all, Eddie’s wake was on Thursday and I didn’t want to interfere with it. My doctor said he only ever had two patients who went home the next day after a full abdominal. I was determined to be his third. All I had to do was pee on my own and fart, my blood work had to be perfect, and I had to walk and walk and walk around the ward. CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! Lo and behold, I was released at 6:00 PM! I was going to be able to recover in the comfort of my own home surrounded by my loved ones and the things I adore.
Alas, what I couldn’t do was go to Eddie’s wake or funeral. My doctor banned any travel for at least a week and Ed forbade me to leave the house. Needless to say, I could hardly move and the pain was pretty horrible. There was no way I would be able to get back into the car, sit in a funeral parlor for hours, and try to pee in a public toilet. Crying, laughing, sneezing, or couching caused some serious pain. sigh … I missed it all.
So, how am I after a week? Pretty good. I’m moving a whole lot better, though I do get stuck if I’m sleeping on my back or if I don’t sit right on a hard chair. I’ve been eating normally, drinking lots of water, taking Advil for my pain, and my urination and BM has been regular and normal. It seems as though no permanent damage was done, thank Goddess! I can’t believe my back and hips are without pain! I’m walking around the apartment and doing little things by myself. Ed helped me cook dinner last night and I’m attempting to shower today without his help — wish me luck. It doesn’t take much for me to get winded or tired, so I’ve been napping a lot. I’m still trapped at home and going stir crazy. I literally can’t pick up a book heavier than a paperback. And I still haven’t attempted to ease back into work. Despite this, I’m on the mend.
As for Ed, well … he’s mourning in his own Ed way. He’s very private about it all and I’ll leave it at that. He’s ok. Me, I’m going to miss Eddie terribly. He was so very kind! It doesn’t help that this is the time of year that my Mom went into the hospital to never see her home again. I’m already raw with memories and mourning. Eddie’s death just adds to it all. sigh … all we can do is persevere.